I never liked the men I loved and never loved the men I liked.
- Fanny Brice


I like to feel prejudice towards people who are prejudice.
- Kurt Cobain


He that's secure is not safe.
- Ben Franklin


I am so busy doing nothing... that the idea of doing anything - which as you know, always leads to something - cuts into the nothing and then forces me to have to drop everything.
- Jerry Seinfeld


It is better to deserve honors and not have them than to have them and not to deserve them.
- Mark Twain


It usually takes more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech.
- Mark Twain


Man is the Only Animal that Blushes. Or needs to.
- Mark Twain


But who prays for Satan? Who, in eighteen centuries, has had the common humanity to pray for the one sinner that needed it most?
- Mark Twain


The more things are forbidden, the more popular they become.
- Mark Twain


Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?
- Robin Williams